Viewing entries tagged
farewell

So long, Wendy's - an open letter

Since the contact form on the Wendy's website rejected my e-mail based on length, I figured maybe I should just post it here. If you happen to be from Wendy's corporate, I'd love to hear a reply. Also, I'm not mad at ya. We just have different ideas of how to raise my money.

And now, an open letter to Wendy's ...

---

Hi there,
My friends and I recently decided to stop being customers of Wendy's. I thought you might like to know why.

For more than 20 years, my friend Bob and I have had a tradition of going to the local fleamarkets here in Houston, usually three or four times per year. On these trips we start early and run hard. We comb every stall, examine every table, and hone in on the cool stuff we like with the precision of a hawk pouncing on a field mouse. When the morning is done, we transition to the other side of the city and start all over with a different set of flea markets.

It's epic.

Part of our tradition, from day one, has always been a stop-over at the Wendy's restaurant located at I-45 and Almeda road. We've been going to that specific restaurant for more than two decades, enjoying a nice, refueling lunch of burgers, fries, and sodas.

A few years ago, after the death of Dave Thomas, we noticed some changes in the way the chain operates. Most notable (to us, anyway) was that the drink machine was moved from the customer side of the counter to the employee side. We were no longer allowed the privilege of pulling our own drinks, filling them to our preference, and refilling them as needed. It didn't make us happy, but we understood it to be some kind of cost-cutting measure. Who could blame you for that?

Us, maybe. But big deal.

We also noticed a little bit of shifting going on with regard to sizes. French fry packaging got smaller, as did the burgers themselves, while the size of the prices seemed to get bigger. Again, not happy. And again, we figured it was about improving your margins. What business wouldn't want to do that?

Despite some annoyances, we have always continued to stop at Wendy's for our fleamarket lunch. In fact, we have often stopped at a Wendy's restaurant when on road trips, when we needed a quick bite on moving day, when we just wanted something good and inexpensive -- though, unfortunately, those two adjectives are starting to apply less and less.

This may seem silly, but recently you guys did something that we consider to be the "last straw." It's a small thing, honestly, but it made a very big difference to us. It sent a message.

You decided to pull the Jr. Bacon Cheesburger from the 99-cent menu.

See? Small. The price jump isn't even that high. But like I said, it sent a message. And that message, from our point of view, is "We don't care about you. We only care about how much money we can get out of you."

Maybe you guys don't mean that. I'm hip. In fact, I'm pretty sure there's a mission statement or a corporate philosophy statement on a wall somewhere in Wendy's HQ that says something to the effect of "We value our customers." But for the past few years, your actions seem to have put the lie to that.

Little things add up.

Anyway, my friend Bob and I have decided never to eat at a Wendy's again. We prefer to take our meager, small, insignificant bit of business to an establishment that, at the very least, isn't constantly trying to squeeze more out of us. We've also convinced several of our friends to stop patronizing your restaurants as well. It wasn't hard, actually. Most of them gave up on you guys a long time ago, citing "food quality," "price," and "customer service" as their reasons.

I'm a little sad about this, because for one thing I always liked our little tradition, and that will be missed. For another, I liked Dave Thomas. I thought he was an amazing guy, and I was proud to support the dream he built, in my small way. Now I just think he'd be upset and hurt. He probably wouldn't eat at Wendy's either.

So anyway, thanks for everything. Sorry we had to say goodbye. We're such a small part of your demographic, I'm sure we won't be missed.

Then again, little things add up, right?

Take care,
Kevin


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Kevin Tumlinson is the author of numerous novels, novellas, and non-fiction books, and the host of the Wordslinger Podcast. Try three of his best books for free when you download his starter library at kevintumlinson.com/starterlibrary.
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Eulogy for 10 Pages

Today I wrote a very satisfying 10 pages. They were, perhaps, the GREATEST 10 PAGES EVER WRITTEN BY MAN. I say this in all humility.

These were wonderful pages. They expressed previously never-before-expressed thoughts that had the power to blow the minds of men and women alike. Children would weep for joy. The dead would be raised. A new epoch of prosperity would begin on this big ol' mud ball we call Earth.

And then, somehow, my beautiful 10 pages were gone, thanks to a foolish move on my part, and the fact that, apparently, Documents to Go doesn't auto save. Or maybe it does but I somehow glitched it. We can never be certain.

So this entry is for you, glorious 10 Pages. You touched my heart during your brief time on this world. I still remember all of those vowels. And, oh! Remember that little typo? You know the one. Wow, that would have been embarrassing if it ever went to print! Such cheeky times we had, 10 Pages. Wonderful, love-filled, strangely erotic cheeky times.

10 Pages, I feel like a better man for having known you. And it makes me sad that you will never get your chance to shine to an adoring public. To you I say farewell. May we meet again, out there in the ether, in the writing afterlife.

Cue "Amazing Grace" on bagpipes. Aaaaaand ... scene.


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Tip in any amount you like, safely and securely via PayPal (no PayPal account requred). And thank you in advance for your generosity!


____________________________________________________________
Kevin Tumlinson is the author of numerous novels, novellas, and non-fiction books, and the host of the Wordslinger Podcast. Try three of his best books for free when you download his starter library at kevintumlinson.com/starterlibrary.
____________________________________________________________

BECOME A SLINGER

Get updates on new books, new posts, and new podcasts, plus be the first to hear about special offers and giveways. And pants jokes. Lots and lots of pants jokes.